Q&A: How to Know if She’s Faking an Orgasm

Question:
Is there any sure-fire way to know if my girlfriend’s faking? She gets a louder in bed when she comes compared with my ex, who was silent. I’m starting to think she’s just putting on a show.

Answer:
Some women are screamers or loud moaners when they’re enjoying sex or experiencing orgasm, especially if they’re comfortable with sex or really into it, so I wouldn’t write off her pleasure as "fake" just because she’s louder than your ex. If anything, I’d wonder what was up with your ex that she never made a peep?

There’s no sure-fire technique to detect fake orgasm. Some women experience noticeable contractions during orgasm but others experience more mild contractions that you wouldn’t necessarily notice on your penis or fingers or however else you’re involved in her orgasm. Some women’s orgasmS seems longer than others And while some women experience “sex flush” (a reddening of the chest) when they experience intense sexual excitement and blood rushes through their body – thus being a precursor to orgasm for some women – other women experience no such thing.

Orgasm does tend to result in a return to “normal” – normal heart rate, breathing, and so on. However, so does stopping stimulation and doing nothing. So just because she chills out after a few minutes or falls asleep does not an orgasmic woman make.

My advice? Keep doing what you’re doing if she seems to like it. And check in from time to time to see what else she’d like to try or explore and let her know about your interests too. There’s a whole world out there of sex positions, places to have sex, sex toys, ways of kissing and touching, rhythms to sex, lingerie, strip teases, and so much more. Have fun exploring!